Thursday, August 12, 2010

Day 3 Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Something I have to forgive myself for is in believing that people change. I have been put through the ringer with my own mother, friends, and even a best friend. All because I think that you should always look for the best in people and give them the benifit of the doubt. Even after they have hurt me, I try to forgive and give them another chance. Some may call it stupid, but it's who I am. I have to forgive myself for being a nice person and believing people can change and be half decent people and wearing my heart on my sleeve. It's a lesson I have learned a few hard times. But it's starting to make me realize that some people just don't deserve my time or friendship or a realtionship with me.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Day 2

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

Something that I love about myself. I love being a mom. I had a very bad childhood. Parents broke up when I was really young and went through a bad custody battle. I was put through the ringer with my mother. And one thing I promised myself was that when I had a child, that I would provide for them to the fullest and made sure they had stability and love. The day my daughter was born, I promised her she would never have to go through anything I ever did. She would have a normal and healthy life. In a way I am glad I went through everything I did. It taught me how to be strong and independent.
I love that no matter how crazy life can get and how stressing she can be sometimes, she will always be the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. I love that I can love her so unconditonally. She is perfect to me in a every sense of the word. I love being a mom. There could be nothing in this world as satisfying as being a mom. So the thing that I love about myself is being a mom :P

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Day 1

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

There are few things I hate about myself. I think the biggest one I hate, is that I am too nice of a person and will do anything to help people out. I would give the shirt off back to someone if I could. Most would think this is a good thing not a bad a thing to hate about yourself. But being nice and caring about people makes me vunerable to people that like to suck me dry and then toss me away when they are done.
I guess I could be labeled as a people pleaser. I will help anyone out, even if I don't want to and just really want to say no. I can't say no. So I do it. But at times I feel that I get used and taken advantage of. There have people that have taken advantage of the fact they know I won't say no. That will make me feel bad they are in jam, knowing that I will help.

For some reason I can't say no and I can't seem to stop helping people. It's what I do and how I have always been. Even after getting burned countless time, I still help people out. More than I probally should.
This is something I really hate about myself. Because I have a heart and want to help people, I hate that I always wear my heart on my sleeve and it almost always gets throwin my face. I hate this more than anything else about myself. I know this is an issue but somehow I can't fix it.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

30 days of truth

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Thursday, August 5, 2010

everything goes in a circle

I am really starting to enjoy blogging, it's a nice outlet and beats my usual pen and my journal :P

Life is hectic but in a LITLLE bit of time, it will all come together and be as we know it. My amazing life! I will have the best husband in the world home. I can't wait to have my arms wrapped around him and to kiss him. All that will wash away this whole deployment, it will be sweet!

Ava, where do I begin lol. She is the most stubborn two year old I have ever met in my life :) Potty training is still a work in progress, some days are better than others, but I know she will get the hang of it, doesn't take her much time to get used to anything. She's getting to know all her colors and numbers and even says some of her ABC's, shes so smart. But has the attitude and tantrum of a tornado sometimes.

I am just so proud of the life we have. I have an amazing husband, a strong marriage, and beautiful, well rounded daughter. Amazing friends. And not everyone can say that, so I am counting my blessings.

We are making the most out of the time we have left here on the west coast. Some good and BAD memories. Lost and gained friends. But the true ones I will always treasure my memories with. I am sad to leave my friends but excited to head back to our family and start a new chapter. This new chapter is going to require a lot of changes for my family but all good and will only benefit them. I will do anything for my family to make sure they have everything they need and are happy. I am looking forward to these changes.

All in all things couldn't be better then they have been. I am loving my life and the way things have been. Life has been so easy and simple and fun. This is pretty much a ramble of randoms, but its what I am feeling.

Till next time...